


Requiem Snippets

by anxious-vigil (roses_have_thorns)



Series: Requiem AU [2]
Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders
Genre: i don't think there are any yet but let me know if you see something you want tagged, i will add warning tags as i post, its a collection of snippets from my au, this isn't an actual fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-26
Updated: 2018-02-26
Packaged: 2019-03-24 08:57:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13807869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roses_have_thorns/pseuds/anxious-vigil
Summary: A collection of short stories in the same timeline as No-one deserves to Fade away.I'm taking prompts so either comment or send me an ask on my tumblr (@anxious-vigil) and I'll get around to it writing it eventually :)





	Requiem Snippets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is for faithfulcat111 who wanted to know how Roman separated from Deceit in the first place. I hope it worked out ok, I loved the idea but couldn't quite figure out how to write it for a bit but I think it turned out alright :)

It starts when Thomas finally decides that he wants to be on stage, giving up on his career in chemical engineering. Roman had been feeling suppressed for so long, his skin too tight, spine stooping, muscles cramping and pulling in to make himself seem smaller. He felt like he was shrinking into himself, ideas coming slower and inspiration fading. As soon as the limitations are taken off and Thomas is actually asking for his input, a rush of energy hit him like a truck and suddenly anything is possible. He feels important and loved, it is him that's keeping the rent money coming in after all, it's Logan's turn to feel small and unwanted and pushed away. Well, that's not quite fair, _but it is Logan's fault for rejecting such an important Side, isn't it?_ Roman pushes away his resentful thoughts, _he's a Disney prince, he isn't so petty as to take things out on Logan just because he wanted Thomas to get a career in the sciences_ , and goes to chase down some ideas. Thomas has done well on Vine, maybe he could try starting a Youtube channel? Ooh, there's so much to do, he hadn't realised how easily tired he was until he could do things without getting fatigued, the turnaround is making his head spin. He's finding it hard to care about anything except getting new ideas out into Thomas' brain.

 

_Yellow tinges one side of his face in the mirror._ It's not enough for anyone to notice _but we should put on some foundation anyway. There's no reason to make people think that you're anything less than perfect._

 

Roman pushes Logan aside as he storms upstairs. He fumes inwardly. Another one of his ideas shot down by Logic. And yes, now he can see how ridiculous and infeasible his ambitions truly were, now reality has been forced into his realm. It hurts to have the cold light of limitations disintegrate all his hard work. _Doesn't Logan realise how much it hurts?_ He's just doing his job. _And I'm just doing mine._ Footsteps chase after him and a hand grips his shoulder. Logan stands there, face twisted and arms open in a pacifying gesture. He opens his mouth to talk, perhaps to apologise, but Roman turns away, a sneer crossing his features, stalking into his room and slamming the door behind him. It's better that he talks to Logan when he's calmer. When he can see things from the other side's point of view. He knows he has problems with his temper and he should protect Logan from that. _He's being kind, Logan doesn't need to see him angry. He's not being petty._ He'll talk to the logical side tomorrow, see if they can work something out so Logan can sort through ideas earlier, when they've not had so much sweat, blood and tears put into them. So when Logan rejects them, he's less invested and it hurts less. For now, he'll take his frustrations out on a dragon or two in Imagination.

 

_His shadow stretches longer behind him._ It's slightly unnerving and he considers asking Logan or Patton to take a look at it. _But it's barely noticeable, just a trick of the light, and even if it's not, hey, he's a prince, he can handle it._

 

The alarm goes off in the distance, muted by the clutches of sleep. Roman frowns as he finishes arranging the flowers in the church. He's been planning this dream for ages, it's disappointing that it has to end now, before the best bit. _But, well, it doesn't have to._ There's not much happening today. Gently, Roman takes Thomas' hand and leads him deeper into the subconscious. Later, Thomas will berate him for making him sleep so late, and for what? He doesn't even want to marry Beyonce! Roman will admit to himself he's a little upset Thomas didn't comment on the amount of work put into his wedding dress. _He doesn't appreciate you._ It's fine. Roman knows Thomas needs him. He knows he's loved.

 

_He catches sight of himself in the mirror. He can't put his finger on why, but he doesn't recognise himself._ A blink and it's gone. _He knows who he is._

 

There's a cute boy at rehearsals. Roman can see a future in his eyes and pushes Thomas to ask him out for coffee. Sat at the back of the room, clutching lemonades as sparkling as the conversation, their phone rings, with Talyn's photo on the screen. They were going to go and see a film together. Time freezes as realisation hits them. Anxiety is whining about letting them down, Morality's claiming we know Talyn better, that we should go to our friend instead of staying with a stranger, Logic is calculating the quickest route to the cinema. Roman takes a breath and uses his new-found power to let hope override all. Day-dream mode is activated and he gestures to shut up the other sides. _This could be their happily ever after. Isn't life all about the quest for true love? He could be the One._ Roman's not a bad guy, _he's just trying his best,_ he's _not..._

 

_The shade following him has grown more solid._ He swears he can touch it sometimes. _But that's ridiculous, isn't it?_ Is it?

 

Patton asks if he's ok. _Of course_ he replies _why wouldn't I be?_ Apparently he's acting slightly odd. Patton worries about the pressure that's come with Thomas' career change. _But Patton, that's silly, Roman's a prince, he can handle pretty much anything. He's not overwhelmed._ He can't think nowadays. Everything's so muddled, like he's swimming underwater. It isn't getting any easier to handle the extra energy Thomas is giving him, it's spinning his head like he's a child on a sugar rush. He feels more important than ever and some of the actions he's taking because of it scares him. But it can't be too bad. He's a nice person, a hero, a prince, he would _never_ hurt his friends.

 

_Voices whisper in Roman's mind._ They push him to his limits, telling him he's _brave, strong, true, so why not show the other sides just what he can do?_ It sounds false but he doesn't know why. After all, he is brave, strong... he shuts the whispers out.

 

Ideas run rampant through his realm, spawned by the many directions Thomas' life could take and brought into life by the excess of spirit inside him. Surrounded by possibilities and not subject to reality, Roman corrals as many as he can, and, unable to choose, simply decides that Thomas must do all of them. Blinded by inspiration, he doesn't, can't, slow to a stop until many hours later. It's 4 in the morning and Thomas has the papers from eight half-finished scripts strewn across his living room. Mind-maps are blu-tacked onto the walls, and then to the floor when they ran out of room. Thomas stares up into Roman's horrified face and, when it becomes clear that the push to create has stopped, collapses back to the sofa with a sigh. He's asleep before his back hits the cushions. Roman rearranges him to lie flat, tucks him in, clears the papers, sinks out, numb. _This isn't him, he can't be the one doing this, it's not... he would never... he's not the villain here._

 

_Of course you aren't,_ his shadow calls to him, _you're kind and helpful, if you ever put yourself before others, it's because Thomas needs you more, he needs you to-_ Stop. Roman says it aloud, pacing his room. I'm not the villain here, you are. Show yourself! Striding to the mirror, he sees the shade rise tall behind him, yellow flashes in awful symmetry in each of their eyes, his face goes white as a terrible rip tears through him, his sense of self falling apart into jagged pieces. _He registers someone stepping out of darkness behind him as he falls to his knees._

 

_When he can stand and grasp his sword with shaking hands, his room is empty and the door leading to Imagination is open. He shuts and locks it. He will hunt down this new threat tomorrow, when he's pulled himself together a bit more. He feels almost like something's missing. But that's impossible, it would only happen through a fracture, and there's no way a threat to Thomas could have ever been a part of him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's surprisingly difficult to write about how someone's self image is drifting away from reality :/


End file.
